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I can still remember how I felt several years ago when I was dating a guy who was hot and cold.
On our first date, he took me to a really nice restaurant where the ambience was romantic, the wine was expensive and the sparks were flying between us. It is these kinds of experiences that make women really hate dating.
The two met at a national MS event, discovered a mutual fascination with fantasy football and Bruce Springsteen music, and fell in love. Similarly, if your date isn’t interested in one more round of drinks, it’s not because the conversation is boring.
It’s more likely the restroom is calling, since bladder issues are common with MS.
I went to bed that night feeling hopeful and happy. Then, out of nowhere, two months later, a text from him: "Been thinking about when we can get together again." Oooh, I burned with anger. Yet at the same time, my heart pounded with excitement. But, the roller coaster ride continued, as after the second night he retreated back into his coldness. A few days later, I called and confronted him."I'd really like to know what's going on. ""I need another drink for that conversation," he replied jokingly. I lied there thinking, "What can I do to make this man love me? " The thing is, I realize now that I was addicted to the hot in his hot-and-cold treatment of me.
The next day, I was hoping for a text saying something like, "Thanks for a nice night." Nothing. You're hot and cold with me and I'm not sure why," I said."Look, I really, really like you," he responded. But I was badly burned in my last relationship and I'm really scared to get serious with someone."Foolishly, I bought it. He was acting very platonic, distant and cool, like we were just friends. It was like I needed a hit of his drug – the one that made me feel like the only woman on earth. It was a horrible, horrible feeling of lack of control.
"I wanted to see someone on a more regular basis, but without the full commitment of dating and having to wonder where it was going." She ended up going out with the guy, and not just once.
He said he was in an open relationship, and everything was good with his girlfriend. But I decided to get over the assumptions and just try it — and it changed so much of what I thought.There’s a lot to love about falling in love, and while the process of dating someone special is exciting and intoxicating, it can also be filled with uncertainty.There are many stages of getting to know a person and sometimes the path to intimacy includes learning about life with a chronic illness like multiple sclerosis (MS).Not only was it a personal relief to date people who didn't have expectations of me emotionally, but I also learned how "I've never been very excited by the prospect of lifelong marriage to one person, so for me, it helps just to have the possibility of new sex," Hailee*, a 30-year-old woman in an open relationship, told "There's that possibility, if you're having drinks with someone, or, say, see someone standing on the subway, for example...there is a sense of possibility [for sex] that is lovely to live with — even if you never, ever exercise it," Cate told There's a strong assumption that someone opens up their relationship simply because they're looking for a hall pass to sleep with anyone they want, whenever they want.